American Fat Bastards Get New Toilet Options
Are you so fat that when you crap, you often get turd leavings on your huge butt cheeks?
Well now you’re in luck!
A company called “The Great John Toilet Company” has just the product for you! It’s the Great John Oversized toilet. Now you can ignore those pesky friends and relatives who’ve been on your case about losing weight, you can keep crapping out those jelly donuts and milkshakes like never before!
The sales literature on greatjohn.com pretty much sums up what a “size friendly” toilet can do for you….
The size of the average person has increased dramatically over the last century. Most toilets made today are manufactured from designs dating back to the early 1900´s. In the past, the pleadings of big and tall people went unanswered. For this reason GJTC engineers, medical doctors and artists took to the task of creating a NEW GENERATION of products satisfying the needs of today’s customers. Our goal was to create the most comfortable and safe toilet for Large-Size people in the market. The other challenge was to make a toilet that could also be used by any size person. The final result was the creation of a “SIZE FRIENDLY TOILET”.
The perfect Christmas item for those extra special Fat Bastards at work, in your community, or in your home, basically, for anyone!
The Gay Black Jew — On 10-24-2007 at 3:03 pm
Thanks for the tip. But what I also need is double-wide toilet paper. Like paper-towel size. TP has stayed the same width forever, and it just doesn’t cover my fat ass anymore…and paper towels are too abrasive. Wait…I think I’m starting a paper-towel size toilet paper business. Thanks!
Bazule — On 10-24-2007 at 4:49 pm
Maybe you can just wear some “oops I crapped my pants” instead of wasting all that time wiping your huge arse?